4 Tips for a Memorable Thanksgiving: A Focus on Family History
Thanksgiving dinner - old

Source: Creative Commons

Thanksgiving is fast approaching, and many families are looking forward to sharing a gastronomical smorgasbord with extended family members. Last year, AAA estimated that 43.6 million Americans journeyed 50 miles or more from home during the Thanksgiving holiday weekend. In addition to keeping our U.S. travel industry in business, these individuals place a priority on – and understand the value of – family.

Of course, that doesn’t mean that everyone gets along. Far from it; many of us have bribed a spouse or sibling into traversing across the country to see that one individual who, years ago, we were so glad to move away from. Yet as extended families (both functional and dysfunctional) reunite around the food-laden table, a phenomenon takes place as differences are briefly set aside and reminiscences take center stage. What better time to preserve those family memories?

  • Recordings
    One of the best ways to capitalize on this gathering is to record the conversations. After all, who is going to take the initiative to handwrite a summary of the day’s conversations on a full stomach while trying to watch the football game or snag a Black Friday deal? Although it may initially seem unnatural to many family members to have a digital recorder placed in front of them on the dinner table or a camcorder set up in the corner aimed at them, you will find that after about 10-15 minutes of talking about a favorite family memory, they will begin to relax and become less self-conscious. Tip: Be sure to have on hand extra charged batteries and memory cards.
  • Pictures
    Don’t underestimate the memory-jogging power of family photos. If you possess some old, unlabeled pictures and you can’t identify all of the people in the images, bring them with you to the gathering and ask older family members to help solve the mystery. Even if they can’t recall the names, they may recognize the background and share some additional interesting stories. Tip: In addition to taking the traditional group family photos at your gathering, take random pictures throughout the day, including the family members looking at the old photos.
  • Recipes
    Because Thanksgiving is synonymous with turkey and all of the trimmings, why not commemorate your relatives’ famous side dishes and desserts?  Notify them beforehand that you would like to obtain their recipes and ask them to bring copies to the gathering. If they’re tech savvy, you can set up an account with an online print-on-demand cookbook site and invite your relatives to enter the recipes there. Once all of you have entered the desired amount of recipes, you can create and order your own family cookbook.
  • Share
    Regardless of whether you do all of the above or just one aspect, don’t keep the information to yourself. Obtain everyone’s current snail mail, email and social media contact information before the gathering disperses. When you return home, make copies of the recordings, videos, photos, and/or recipes and send them to your extended family. Who knows? That might be the peace offering to remove that old family grudge.

The most important thing is for you to enjoy your holiday. Don’t become overzealous in your attempts to document family history; it will only cause you stress and annoy your family. Make it casual and fun, and even if you don’t solve the mystery of a photo or you forget to press “Record” on your camcorder, the important thing is that you get everyone talking about your family’s history, which can open the door for a new tradition at future family gatherings.

A Case for Old-Fashioned Interaction
old photo album

Source: Creative Commons

There’s something special about blowing the dust off the lid of a faded box and slowly removing its contents. Immediately, you are transported back in time as you decipher handwritten letters, gaze at black-and-white photographs, and carefully inspect random memorabilia. It is even more rewarding to look through those treasures with loved ones as they reflect on their past experiences. The problem is that such moments are themselves becoming things of the past in our fast-paced, technological and far-flung world.

In today’s society, rather than taking the time to pen handwritten letters and cards, we opt to share our life experiences via social media outlets such as Facebook and Twitter and send e-Cards. Instead of ordering double prints and painstakingly labeling the back of each photo before mailing them to friends and family, we digitally upload and share our pictures on photo storage sites like Snapfish and Shutterfly. It’s instantaneous and, many might argue, still reflects the same amount of consideration toward the recipient.

However, looking at something through a screen is a far cry from the sensory experience of actually holding an item in your hands. Take an old diary or journal, for example. Not only can you look at it closely at varying angles in order to decipher the handwriting, but you can touch it. You can feel the smoothness of the worn leather cover and the brittleness of the yellowing, stained pages. You can hear the gentle crinkle of the pages as they are turned and the soft whisper of an old photo or theater ticket as it falls to the floor. Depending on where the journal was stored or how old it is, you might detect the distinct smell of aging paper or even a trace scent of flowers from an old sachet.

It is undeniable that the Internet and technology offer us much in the way of communication, but we all crave face-to-face interaction occasionally. This is especially true for the oldest members of our society. Oftentimes, seniors wish to talk about their experiences and share their learned lessons with loved ones, but this actually only takes place, if at all, at holidays or other family get-togethers. These tend to be stressful times when many are distracted by the meal preparations, the big game on TV and exuberant children on a sugar rush.

It should come as no surprise, then, that my clients enjoy the dedicated one and two-hour intervals that we sit together; a time where they get to discuss, at length and uninterrupted, on the topics of their life experiences. Frequently, they get so excited about the process that they jot down notes in preparation for the next interview session, not wanting to overlook an important, amusing, or insightful event.

If you are fortunate enough to still have living grandparents and/or aging parents, try to take the time to sit and listen to them. You may need to ask a few questions to get them started, but you will soon discover how easily they relax and begin to engage you in their stories. Take notes, record the session and enjoy the experience. It will be treasured by each of you, as well as your descendants.